Wednesday, February 13, 2008

.. [ tomorrow ] ..

I am on the road back to Seattle. I am not very happy about homeless shelters, concrete floors and one inch floor mats. But, then again this is not cruel and unusual punishment, this is regulatory justice only put upon on sex offenders. Especially, this particular sex offender who refuses to let go of the fact he was convicted so two rapists could walk free and the state could protect them, after the youngman testifies that I never sexually touched or engaged in any sexual propensities!

Unless of course if this state wishes to allow for a young gay man and an older gay man, based on a friendship, to be considered a sexual propensity, then I have to say that this state is the most bigoted state I have ever met.

Justice in the process that provides for the state to participation in the protection of men who molest, after a youngman tells them the truth of who did molest him, is incomprehensible! I am returning not with the same passion from which I left, but reinvigorated, that to stand outside such a horrible system, only strengthens my position that this youngmans life had been hugely impacted negatively by these very actors. I remember every night the words of the Honorable Alsdorf during the early proceeding's, "I cannot help but feel this case is morphing...We will get to the truth and figure out who are the actors and what is the truth in this case."

Nope. Not yet. You can never get to the actors, if the political system is so ingrained in hate that it cannot see, or does not care, who it is victimizing. This is my passion!


Friday, February 8, 2008

.. [ so I was told ] ..

So yesterday morning I was told by my Seattle CCO that he would investigate me returning to my address where I lived previously, so at least I would ne be homeless when I returned. Then he took Russel phone numbers. I as well let him know that I really want to move back to my state of residence. Which is Portland . But, only because at least there I can find housing, and maybe even a job!

Today I read an article, and the only thought I could think of was to add to the end of the article... "and sex offenders in Washington."

"Think about that. Did you ever imagine that we would have a president who uses legalistic euphemisms and craven rationalizations to justify strapping prisoners down and subjecting them to simulated drowning? A president who claims the right to use waterboarding, and God knows what other "techniques," in the future if he wants?

This is a moral outrage, people. At least, it should be. There simply cannot be any kind of pro-and-con debate over the use of torture -- whatever anodyne phrase you hide it behind -- by agents of the United States government on persons in custody. Torture is not debatable. It is forbidden by U.S. and international law. It is a vile implement used by tinhorn despots, not by the elected leaders of great democracies." ("Damage That Must Be Undone", By Eugene Robinson, Friday, February 8, 2008; Page A19).


Wednesday, February 6, 2008

..[ marching papers ]..

So today I got my marching papers. I am to arrive in Seattle on the 14th. I called my CCO, or the one I guess may be my CCO, to try to arrange for approval prior to my arrival to Seattle. I am trying to go back to the home I lived in for a year and the owner of the house has been very supportive in trying to help me find housing. He offered me a home outside of Seattle, one in the Virgin Islands and another he has just outside the area where I lived before. He is a good man, who has been very helpful in helping me not live on the streets. But, each time the DOC has chosen making me homeless over helping find or in approving housing in a timely matter such that the opportunity may not be lost.

DOC's 10 day housing approval metric, turns into at minimum 2 business week days. How many business minded landlords would be willing to hold an apartment or home that long without some type of guarantee. Every housing unit that I had successfully approved, even after digging deep to find an opportunity found that 2 weeks to hold a place just-in-case, was an unacceptable business practice.

When I contemplate what has happened to me during this experience, I cannot help but recognize, that being convicted of a sex crime in Washington carries with it the automatic pulse of not being able to find work, housing or very little educational opportunities. Although, it may be true that the sex-offender legislation in of itself does not create a housing or employment problem, but the extreme hyper sensitivity of the actual sex offender designation does. At least here in Washington. Let me give you an example: I recently replied to a room for rent advertiser on CraigsList in Seattle, who had a basement room to rent. My letter was straight forward and to the point. I wrote:


My name is Mike, I am a business type, who ended up moving to Arizona this summer and now am returning to Washington by this Monday.

I see you are still renting your room, I am very interested in renting the room. I am a sex offender so I have to register where I live. I am as well gay, but I do not date. If this situation is acceptable, I would be interested in calling you about your room.


and then I received this reply:

"you must be crazy, i wouldnt let you be anywhere near my daughter."

of which I replied:

I am so sorry. Your ad had no indication that a daughter was there. Also, I assure you I am gay and that any fear about issues surrounding a sex offender, in my case, is one that would not be in place in my situation.

Thank You for revealing your concerns, as I as well share issues concerning safety for everyone.



The courts here are obsessed with justifying that such a little incidence of a renter not wanting to rent as a business proposition, fails to ignore the most important issue of the responders email, Her willingness to compel a belief.

Here in Arizona, self-proclaimed having the toughest sex-offender laws in the country, I have found both a job and have actually felt very little ability to live a life after conviction.

I have while waiting in the DOC office each week have talked to many people who are sex offenders who have informed me that once leaving the prison system, they where put into half-way houses, when they have had no place to stay. They tell me about job opportunities and on the job training programs, especially ones that do not exclude sex offenders. Then I begin to wonder - wait I saw none of this in Seattle. NONE. Nor have I heard any such programs even after inquiring.

I find it preposterous to believe that a system so concerned about community safety has only one contingency plan, mane sex offenders with so much regulation and oversight, then turn a blind-eye or have a pampas attitude when these offenders have no options to live life. I remember vividly what my second CCO told me, "It appears society wants us to arrest you."

I think he is absolutely wrong!

Society wants government to make society safe by finding and arresting people who have committed crimes. Arresting sex offenders on a hyper sensitivity of rules in the community, does not make society any safer than the renters belief, that due to me having to register as a sex offender, made me automatically wanting to seek out her one year old daughter, who I never even knew lived with her. You have to ask, was she simply just being proactive, or being reactive?

Unfortunately, the answer is the latter, for she didn't gather facts, she reacted in a perverted manner by dealing with a label as the only indicator needed in the molestation of her daughter. One truly does not lead to the other. Now that is pretty perverted thought. I wonder if she would have had the same reaction if I was labeled as a wife beater, a husband beater, a drug dealer, a drug user, a alcoholic ...


Tuesday, February 5, 2008

.. [ from the comforts of home ] .. to the streets of Seattle

Call me a pessimists. Or quite possibly a realist. But, today I got a call from my PO in Phoenix who informed me since Seattle has not responded to my travel permit, they are sending me on my way. I quite do not understand the mechanics of what he said. But, I did not care. All I heard as that I have to leave my warm home and my best friend Turtle to live potentially on the streets.

I have made a few calls, and have secured a place to live once there. But, once again, if Seattle continues the melody of housing approval (or I should say denial) games they played before me leaving. The homeless shelter will once again be where I have to stay.

This is what I call plain counter productive. I have been in the community for now almost three years. I have done nothing but live by their Uber standards, that can only be explained as ineffective, for it is a fact only 6% of all sex offender recidivists, recitative within a year of being released into the community. All this effort - does nothing - but waste resources on taking care of the real issue. Like convicting the molesters who raped the alleged victim and in fear pointed the guilty finger at me. It makes me think that with all the alleged sophistication of our legal system, it tends to fail to do the most obvious thing, protect the child. He got on the stand for 6.5 hours and he told you who raped him and as plain as could be said he explained I never touched him as was claimed by those rapists, that the state now protects!

They protect them to protect this maligned conviction, and I am disgusted to have to step onto Washington's soil, for every step I make on their streets I am reminded that this young mans life has been bombarded with legal justification that allows and protects people who raped him. What a farce. The mantra of "protect our most valuable resource" has been lost in the politics of dancing around facts and legal process.

The painful reality is I have yet again to share the streets of two men who raped this now young man, and I am angry at the process that allows for both to occur.


Friday, January 25, 2008

..[ ladytron ]..

I am sitting here now for several weeks waiting for my travel papers back to Seattle.

But, in the meanwhile I found a cafe, that reminds me of the place I miss so much. They are playing "Ladytron" - the art - the white walls - the Friday night, it is all so familiar - it is all SO DAMN sad.


Wednesday, January 16, 2008

... [ well ... hmm ... ] ..

Today, I go the word that Arizona is refusing to allow me to be transferred from here to Portland. They are demanding that I go back to Seattle and straighten out the debacle of being transferred here under parole when it appears I should have been put under probation.

They have pressured me to ask for a request to transfer back to Washington, or to stay here and have to make a claim about my crime that is not true, in order to take part in treatment.

They asked that I go to a therapy program here that would accept me with not having to admit the crime, but after talking to the therapist it is a scary proposition. In the course of an hour meeting she informed me that the program from which initially denied me treatment had a therapist there that was fired four time.

It is scary. If she is so willing to talk about someone personal life. Then she would equally be willing to say things that are potentially not true in my case. I am not willing to take a chance. Especially with all teh issues that have been part of this crazy experience.

Anyways .. M.